Merry Christmas!

Ni hao! (That’s Mandarin for "hi".) As per Riddle tradition, as the new member of the family, I am writing the Christmas letter and giving my version of 2007. It’s been a big year for me and it is good to be HOME!

My name is Josie and I’m two and three quarters. I’ve been here seven months and feel like I’m just warming up. I think I’ve got Michael under control now; Chloe was wrapped around my little finger from that first moment. It did take awhile to get used to Daddy and Mommy: their hair color and the way they talk and respond, it was all very strange. But now I feel free!! My heart used to feel so heavy I barely ever smiled. I spent my time positioning myself with the other kids and trying to get the nannies to give me what I wanted. But here I can be myself and I am figuring out who that is. I’ve found I like to grin and sing. I can eat all the food I want. All I have to do is say "hug" or "lap" and I’ve got it. The idea of a daddy and a mommy all for me is pretty awesome. It’s a whole new world in so many ways.

Here are some of our milestones:
February 14th Daddy and Mommy received my referral call and saw my picture for the first time. Happy Valentine’s Day!
March 7th was my birthday but I didn’t know it or know I had a family.
On May 8th I met my daddy and mommy and officially became theirs the next day in my hometown of Nanjing, PRC.

The summer was a blur of adjustment. There were swimming lessons (for the siblings-the tub was plenty scary for me), road trips, and lots of immunizations.
Then in the fall school started and we settled into a new routine. Chloe is a first grader who loves pink, princesses, girlfriends, singing, and her little sister and brother. Michael does some pre-k activities, but mostly plays with me. He loves going, going fast, Lightning McQueen, laughter, and AWANA. He had surgery in February and is feeling (and sleeping) much better.

I’m really liking the Christmas lights and can’t wait to discover what we do at this time of year. Mommy says she can’t wait until I understand why we do what we do at Christmas time. Merry Christmas, everyone!


Love,
Josie An

(Here I am signing "I love you.")

Christmas '07

Click play to see Chris' slide show of before and after pictures

of Josie set to Third Day's Merry Christmas song.

Six Months Since Gotcha Day!

Six months ago today, Chris and I held Josie for the first time. Jillions of hugs and kisses later, we took the kids to lunch at a local Chinese restaurant to celebrate. Josie liked everything (as usual). And since it was American Chinese food, there were only a couple of things Mommy ran into that she didn't like ( : We decided those must be the more authentic selections. Josie didn't know why Mommy didn't care for them.

Now she's taking her nap. She knows the routine. After a diaper change, she'll get to watch a short video with her siblings, usually of children singing songs or of talking vegetables. Then she'll have some play time before Daddy comes home and we have dinner (not that we'll be able to eat much after that lunch!). Next there will probably be some reading and wrestling with Daddy before it is time to stretch her elbow, range her shoulder and strengthen her external rotators. Then there's the usual bedtime rituals of PJs, teeth brushing, and face washing. We'll all pray together on the couch, someone will choose how to go to bed (planes and skipping are favorites), and Daddy and Mommy will do their special pattern of hugs and kisses. "Good night, Josie. We love you like crazy cakes. See you in the morning, Sweet Potato."

Part of the Family

We have acutally had a few people request another update, so here it is. However, this should be seen only as a weening post. ( : I'll try to remember to update here in 6 months and a year.

More and more Josie is fitting in to the family and we are also merging. She is more smiles than screams now. She loves to race her thumb to her mouth at bedtime before Mommy can get her kissed and laughs hysterically when she has her thumb subsequently plucked from her mouth. This is our nightly ritual. But then, so is her throwing her little China girl doll on the floor as soon as I shut the door! She is also realizing Mommy is more stubborn than Josie and is making some better choices because of it. She is enjoying farm animal books and makes the sounds along with us. Michael can "read" these books to her too. She still dislikes her exercises but is improving in her range of motion because of them. We visit a specialist medical team in August and plan to start the re-do of the immunizations as well as the blood work and TB test then. We hope she will be able to visit her Nanjing buddies (Abby and Rylan) in the future. Actually Chris and I want to stay in contact with our traveling partners too and enjoy hearing about how they are doing.

Air Guitar Josie

Oh, the fun we will have!

WOW!

Saturday Chris and I received a response from Shaohannah's Hope (Steven and Mary Beth Chapman's adoption facilitation non-profit). We were shocked and elated to read we are recipients of a grant for the adoption!!! I wanted to just share it here (even though I didn't plan to add to this site) mainly because I want to say, "God was gracious, even though I was pouty." I am so grateful for the help and so...I don't know the word for the emotion! I am glad God saw fit to give it to us even though He didn't have to. It is a reminder that He knows my heart and loves me anyway. He gives like a parent more concerned with the daughter's character and faith that the gift itself. I had been disturbed that trying to be wise financially resulted in less help than if we'd gotten into debt. At the same time, I was grateful for what we had. So those two thoughts battled in my mind. And then He does this.

Two Week Update

She knows she's cute! And she's starting to realize she's loved. We are seeing loads of smiles, getting lots of sweet kisses, and she's beginning to be comfortable being held and cuddled. In fact, she is now willingly making the choice to calm down in our arms (rather than raging against being held against her will) and making long eye contact and smiling after she calms!! This is a huge blessing and something we have been praying for. (Resisting or disliking being held is one of the signs of a lack of attachment and she definately struggled here.) I cannot tell you how thrilled I am! We received an attachment checklist from our agency and I was encouraged to see the progress from our first days home to today. She is quite responsive to us and is becoming more so every day.

She is also giving and receiving love from her big sister and even starting to from her big brother (when he's not taking her toys). We went to lunch today with THREE of her grandmas and her grandpa and she actually said, "done" when I told her she didn't have to keep eating. Wow, saying no to food is a big one! She no longer displays fear of T-Rex and she cries only seconds when put to bed. My feelings of attachment are much stronger now that I am well, and amazingly, those sessions of holding her through her rage and anger and sweat and tears has drawn her much closer to my heart. I found myself uttering promises to her I couldn't have said two weeks ago.

Yesterday a visitor commented her husband decided against trying to adopt out of the foster system. He was concerned (and with good reason) of what a damaged 2 or 3 year old would be like, the chaos it would create in the family, and whether he would be able to love a child like that in comparison to his bio children. I know I cannot speak to loving a bio child. And adjustments of all kinds are difficult. But, oh, how I wish they would do it. Tears well just thinking about it. The risk IS huge. But the thought of the unknown is worse than the reality...especially the reality after adjustment! There is such a need. No child deserves to be brought up without a family. We've often said if everyone who thought about it did it, we wouldn't have an orphan crisis in our world. Josie just gave me a high five for that line! But we've convinced no one. I would so love to know that this blog of our experience helped an orphan to find family or encouraged someone to support a family trying to adopt. 5.5 million in Africa. 3.5 million in Asia. 1.5 million in Eastern Europe. 400,000 in Latin America. 135,000 in the US.

Thank you for walking through this with us. We have needed your support over these last three years. This chapter is closing. But stay tuned, we hope there will be more to come. Michael still wants that little brother. And when asked if they would rather have help paying for college or bring another little one home from an orphanage, our kids show big hearts. (Okay, and a good measure of ignorance!) Laura F., I don't now about the "100 children legend", but if God provides a way....Let's just say the emboidered picture you brought us from China is on our living room wall as a reminder. We are thinking of Ethiopia. But that would be impossible; another international adoption; no way could we do that. Wait, didn't we say that before?

"But you, O God, do see trouble and grief;

You consider it to take it in hand.

The victim commits himself to you;

you are the helper of the fatherless."

Psalm 10:14

What a Difference a Family Makes!

J ust two weeks,
O h how far she's come!
S ee her pet the dog?
I magine the difference a family makes.
E ncouraging, isn't it?

(Ready to see it for yourself? Visit familylife.com and click on "hope for orphans" or do an internet search for "waiting children and adoption." Or, if you can't, please find a family who is trying and help them make it a reality!)

Our "blue couch photos"

Yeah!

One Week Update

Yeah!!!
*Our lost luggage was found and delivered via FedEx. Nothing was broken!
*We've had visits from Selena's brother, nephew, sister, mom and aunt, Tammie and Makayla, the Simmons, the Balls, LuzBetty, the Eckels and Samson! Chris' parents will be here next week and both Josie's great-grandmas on that side are also planning a visit thanks to them.
*Selena is feeling MUCH better and no longer associates being sick with Josie. ( :
*Josie no longer screams whenever a sibling touches her or she sees T-Rex. (She even pet the dog and now enjoys chasing him and then barking at him!)
*After Selena had to miss church Sunday to keep her bugs to herself, she is much looking forward to tomorrow (three weeks away is too long). We plan to wear our Chinese outfits.
*Josie cries when put to bed, but stays there and soon falls asleep. She usually sleeps until we wake her.
*Friends from church have provided a couple of meals, with more planned (thank you, thank you!).
*Our photos are being developed.
*Our stomachs have stretched back to their original size so we can eat full meals again and we have recovered from the time change.
*Chloe and Michael continue to love Josie and enjoy telling her that in the midst of her fits: "I love you anyway!"
*Josie's skin is doing so much better. The scars are fading well and she's not scratching nearly as much. She is also not screaming at bath time and is enjoying parts of it.
*We still aren't satisfied with her level of dependence on us as her sole providers/parents, but today when introduced to a friend (a stranger to her) after she initially went freely to him to be held, she pulled back and wanted Mommy. He graciously understood this was a good thing.

Here's a picture from Aunt Janice from the 1:00am first meeting:

"I can't believe she's really here!"-Chloe

Dancing to Cedarmont Kids

(I think this is how Chloe learned English!)

Adjustment to Home

One of the things the orphanage taught me was that whatever behaviors Josie has, there is a reason for them.


*She stuffs food in her face until she cannot chew it, let alone swallow. Then it all comes out.
*She screams when a child touches her and pushes away.
*She collapses into a puddle and cries out whenever displeased.
*She runs full force and collapses into us with no regard for her safety or ours.
*A friend of hers would growl and grunt in bizarre ways when not happy.

-They told me "when her bowl is empty, show it to her or she'll cry." She'd never been fed until she was full. (I took a picture of a young girl for her coming-soon American mom. She would not put down her bowl for the picture even with great coaxing from the nannies. I took several pictures with the bowl at her mouth, it contained a bit of broth she'd not yet finished.)
-She's territorial and must defend her space.
-Chinese people pay attention to the crying baby (even complete strangers help if the child cries).
-There's a good chance the nanny will catch you if you'll be hurt otherwise.
-This last one was the most shocking for me and thankfully, one Josie uses the least.



It has been very difficult for me to deal with the constant fits. We tried comforting and ignoring. Now we just say "no" "up" and lift her back to her feet. But we have to do this continually: if we say no, if she sees the dog, if Michael or Chloe touch her, if I am requiring her to feed herself the fingerfood, if it is time for bed, etc. But it is getting better. She slept through the night last night. She used her fork at lunch as long as I loaded it. She is saying at least one new English word a day.

Chloe and Michael are doing well with her. Chris reminds me she is cute and will become more and more the child God intends her to be. I'm still in the "Why did we do this? We were really happy with two children" mode, but know my adjustment will come around as well. We know the truth: she is a beautiful creation, she was meant for our family, I was meant to be her Mom, and God will give me all I need to love her day by day. Soon it will come as naturally as breathing and yet surprise me with its strength. I have seen glimpses. I have experienced it twice before. And I am all the more grateful for a God who took me when I was a wreck and continues to love me through my fits, knowing I am not what I will be through His love and care.


The below pictures are of our first meeting.

Later, when asked what the orphanage wanted Josie to know in the future, the nanny said, that "she is usually afraid of strangers, but she went right to you; you were meant to be her mom." Now, maybe she was talking about the first second, because, as you can see, this was not a child who was happy the second second! Perhaps it was a standard line. But I also asked what they liked most about Josie. First they said, "she's smart," but they quickly changed it to "her smile."

or the third second!

Ah, but thanks to Mr. Scott and Grandpa Riddle, we were prepared with fruit chews!

Josie thinking, "you look really weird."

Here we are introducing her to her big sister and brother.

Her Half-the-Sky grandmother is there: the person she was closest to in all the world.

Orphans

This little one has a family! You can tell by the collection of items under her crib which came in a care package. Josie received something similar from us.

When our group saw the number of babies in their cribs (and we just visited one floor), someone asked when their paperwork would be done (ie-why do we have to wait so long?) The interpreter told us they had to wait to see which ones could be adopted (ie. strong enough to survive; adoptable through the typical program; or with special needs, but of the variety Americans would still adopt). Lying in the corner of the room, closest to us was a baby with an eye infection. The cellulitis (red, inflammation of tissue) was extensive: at least an inch all the way around the eye socket. I wondered if she would loose her sight. I thought of my antibiotics back in my bag at the hotel room. I thought of the eye doctor from my church who'd have that baby healthy in no time. I wondered if she would be a survivor. I wanted to go in and pick her up and pray over her. I just took a picture and walked to the next room.

I belive this is the one, right in the corner. But I'm not positive-there were several rooms just like this.

More Pictures: Beijing

Beijing was our first stop and looking back, taught us the most about China. This was mainly because of our guide. She ran a narrative the entire time we were with her. For instance, at Tienneman Square she informed us the Chinese people are forbidden to talk about what happened there and she does not know herself. She wasn't asking us for information, just stating she didn't know and couldn't find out. The image of that tank rolling over an unarmed person standing in silent protest was one of my earliest images of China and remains a vivid picture of our deep need for freedom and the ability to find Truth. She also spoke of Hong Kong and Taiwan along Community Party lines and I realized (I don't know why I was suprised) this was all she'd ever heard. She had no idea this was a point of contention with the Western world or that those rooms held for them in the builing behind us would remain empty if the said inhabitants had their way. None from our group told her anything different; there was no opening, no desire to know.

This is one of the stadiums being built for the 2008 Olympics. She told us there were three things the Olympic Committee wanted Beijing to address: 1) the pollution, 2) the traffic, and 3) supplying enough English translators. We found the way these were being addressed very interesting. Several companies who produce the most pollution were relocated to different parts of China, with the government footing the bill. I cannot imagine the cost of this, and wonder what the same money applied to green technology would have done. But they just moved the problem. Greenery was then brought in. Everywhere were new trees and shrubs, freshly planted. Our guide told us the Beijing people were most excited about this as their city was much more beautiful now. Lastly, the government began counting the "blue skies." Everyday that some patch of blue sky was visable, it was a blue sky day. Indeed, we saw some! Our guide hadn't seen any before these changes were made, it was always grey. Still, it was notibly polluted to us and several of us experienced sore throats while we were there from the pollution. #2 Traffic. A new mass transit system is being installed at great cost. But our guide is 100% confident the Beijing people will not use it after the Olympics. She said they would not want to be crowded together when they could drive. Also, she said the government will just tell the people to drive on X days if they had an even tag and on Y days if an odd tag. She thought the Chinese were very clever and could come up with out of the Western box solutions. And even though she'd told us in numerous ways that the Chinese people consider laws to be suggestions and are really in it for themselves, she told us here that they would put country above themselves. #3 English translators: she thought this bizarre since every student is taught English and they have billions of people. The taxi drivers are having mandatory English lessons to keep their licenses, but she says they are quite resentful of this.

And three other tidbits: 1) She believes the USA will not permit Chinese people entry as tourists! She thinks this a grave economic mistake on the part of America, since they have money to spend. No one told her that it is China who limits this, not the US! 2) She counts it odd the Americans believe in God (the majority of the Americans she interacts with are adopting and are Christian). She said her parents' generation worshipped Buddha, but only when she had a test they wanted her to pass. Now, our group thought that sounded like a lot of nominal Christians in the US, so we have that in common! But she said her generation (she is 25) does not rely on a god, they rely on themselves. For me, this explained a lot of the little cultural differences I'd been experiencing: the Chinese do not form lines, it's cut and shove and every man for himself; the distain for the disabled; the incredulous looks and questions at why we'd want more than one child (they cost $ to raise) or why we'd take one who had a disability. But she also said that after being around us "crazy Americans" for two years she'd decided to have a child. Before she didn't want to because she likes her $ too much. Now she thinks she will since her mother-in-law would help care for him/her. But she and her husband are dragon and tiger. This year's pig wouldn't be a good match, maybe next year.

Some Laughs

Pictures are coming, really! Our internet is too slow to download them so as soon as I get a chance to borrow some high-speed access (ie, when may I come over, Mom?), I'll share some shots of the orphanage (great for insight into Josie's behavior) as well as some homecoming picts.

But here are some humorous China moments:

*A saleslady in Guangzhou asked a group in her way if she could "pass away". She meant pass through but the rude English-speaking man informed her she could pass away any moment and it would be fine with him. We did take the time to explain she'd just asked permission to die and which word to use next time. This was the same lady in whose store Chris had passed 20 minutes during a Josie nap time. Every time she asked if he "liked", he's say "maybe" totally frustrating her. (You have to remember a customer is stalked with great determination since commission is involved.) She remembered him and called us by name every time we went by (which was often since it was on the way to Lucy's-the American food restaurant).

*The Nanjing orphanage girls started out growling at each other if the other came too close to the food supply those first days. Their "sharing" consisted of taking pretend crumbs of food and offering it to one another (and it was pretend eaten!). By the last day together, Abby had a hamburger and was freely offering Josie bites. They had figured out the food was in good supply.

*At Lucy's the first time, Josie had some ketchup on her face and grunted for a napkin. When I realized we didn't have any and communicated that, she pretend picked one up, dabbed the corners of her mouth and then set it down on the table before giving us a sparkling grin. I wasn't expecting pretend play and was delighted.

*Rylan, another Nanjing child, was a hoot. He has a hilarious sideways glance that always left a grin on my face. We explained to his parents that in India, marriages are arranged and we often tell Chloe this. So I suggested an early arrangement between Rylan and Josie. We took their picture in front of a carved jade castle (future home). But they act more like siblings. In fact, when they were told no for rocking a stroller, Rylan immediately pointed to Josie and raised his eyebrows in an innocent/wrongly accused expression. This family lives only one state away so we hope to see them again. (SIL Linda-they are from your home town!) The dads were watching the kids while moms were in a meeting. Rylan dropped a cheerio and when dad picked it up to throw it away he melted to the floor in typical Nanjing orphanage fashion and began to howl. Chris quickly grabbed the bag to show him there were more, but unfortunately, grabbed it from Josie who then also melted to the floor in pathetic wailing. The dads just looked at one another. There is no going back once the melt has begun. (P.S. this is the reaction T-Rex gets evey time Josie sees him; he sulks to his kennel each time.)

*Small world: There was a couple in our group which had grown up in Chris' home town and 12 miles from my maternal home town. In a bus once, I asked the American couple behind me where they were from and they were from the same state. We were the third couple they had met from our state! On finding day, friends from our group chatted with a couple from another agency who was also receiving a daughter from Nanjing. Turns out that couple had once lived where they lived and they'd gone to the same church.

Riddles are home!

5:30 am China time saw us leaving our hotel room for the airport in Guangzhou. 5:30 pm China time saw us STILL flying home. 5:30 am China time saw us at the Chicago airport with half of our 5 hour layover done (we were eating at McDonald's). 1 am our time saw us introducing Josie to the kids as well as Aunts Shana and Janice and Grams. We were back in bed by 3 am.

Josie did well for a two year old spending over 24 hours traveling. We had no issues with her "diapers." Big thank you, God! Back home, she is slowly getting used to our house and the kids. She was shocked to realize she had to share Mommy and Daddy with two other kids! Michael is learning to keep his hands off her face (she has an instant, high-pitched scream) and Chloe is patiently waiting for Josie to warm up to cuddles. They made friends at the initial meeting by feeding Josie marshmallows!

Josie is TERRIFIED of T-Rex. He cannot even look at her from across the room without sending her into a fight-or-flight hysteria. We thought about sending him to Grams for awhile so she could get used to the house first, but right now he's still here (in a corner somewhere feeling rejected).

We are going to take a "nobody hold her but Daddy and Mommy" approach for the next couple of weeks. We feel she needs this more than Chloe did as Josie is still working on her attachment to us and we think she's not quite where she would need to be for us to pass her around. We are hopeful to be in church tomorrow morning but we won't be able to put her in the nursery for the same reason. Ever try to tell a two year-old who doesn't speak your language to please be quiet during the service???

Michael and Chloe grew while we were gone even though I had explicitly told them not to do that. So disobedient! Daddy and Mommy are really proud of them for coping these last two weeks. Of course, that had much to do with five wonderful relatives who took care of them! They had a jar of Hershey's kisses so they could see the time left as they each had a kiss "from us" daily. Last night as Michael ate his last kiss, Aunt Shana reports he said, "It's a real exciting sing!" We agree.

Oh, and Michael's quote upon meeting Josie? "Let's talk about a boy now." He did wait until we brought Josie home, just as we'd asked . (He'd been wanting to talk about a brother for some time.)

It is so good to be home. In addition to our kids, we've enjoyed showering in clean water that doesn't stink and using the faucet to brush our teeth. I'm also enjoying the washing machine and the dish washer! We washed our clothes in the hotel bathtub while we were gone and hung our clothes all over the room!

Thanks to Shawn and Tammie for meeting us at the airport! Thanks to Kim for keeping this blog updated! Thanks to Shana for the clean house! Thanks to Grandpa and Grandma Riddle, Grams, Aunt Janice and Aunt Shana (who took 1 1/2 weeks off) for caring for Chloe and Michael. Thanks to Marta for the second phone card for the kids (it was soooo good to talk to them each morning.) And thanks for all the prayers for us while we were away. Please continue to pray for our transition to "zone defense" and for Josie, she is overwhelmed right now. I will try to post some photos in the next few days, but don't have the gumption right now. (It is almost 6 am China time so it's like pulling an all-nighter even though it is just dinner time now!)

Also, we lost a bag in China. It didn't make it from the Chinese airline to United. It contained some gifts but also the two gifts the orphanage gave to Josie and us. So we'd also appreciate prayer that it is found and delivered to United!

Yeah! She's home!!! And she's definately a Riddle ( : And as of touch down in Chicago, she's also an American citizen!!

Hong Kong

It is 11:40am here and we board the plane in about 20 minutes. We made it out of Guangzhou and our flight out of Hong Kong to Chicago appears to be on time. We have a 5 hour layover in Chicago and will go through customs/immigration there. Once we reach US soil, Josie will be a US citizen!! This is a change from when we brought Chloe home. Yesterday we finished up the shopping, took the oath at the US consulate's and went out to eat one last time with our travel group. We fly to Chicago with two families from that group, including one of Josie's orphanage mates. We are tired but doing well. So glad we brought congestion meds as I am needing them!

Please pray for Josie to not have trouble with her "diapers" on the plane. It started to become a concern yesterday. Too many cereal Os perhaps; but they keep her happy! We can't wait for this next part of the trip to be over and to be home! But it has gone well and Josie is almost there! Love you Chloe and Michael!! Thank you everyone for your prayers and help. See you soon!

Guangzhou #2

Hi all! It is Tuesday afternoon here. We need to have our bags outside the door Friday morning by 5:20 to begin our journey home. Still to come is our consulate appointment (tomorrow) in which our CCAI guide goes and we stay in our hotel room by the phone in case there is something wrong. Thursday we actually go to the consulate for our oath. We can take a diaper in a clear zip lock bag but no camera or other bags. We miss you Chloe and Michael and are very much looking forward to giving you real hugs! We show Josie pictures of her "GiGi" and "GaGa" and tell her she is a "MeiMei." You will love her little kisses! She is now waving goodbye and giving hi fives. She still will not eat off her plate; she must be fed. If we put the bite on a napkin, she will finger feed, but she won't take it off her plate unless it is a french fry or a cheerio. (Yeah, Lucy's-an American food restaurant here).

Today we went to the pearl market. We still have lots of shopping to do tonight as we've only found two gifts for the relatives ( : But the pearl market had a Pizza Hut so Mommy was happy. And good news: Josie likes it! Again, a sure sign she is a Riddle!

The pictures today are the last ones we will be able to post here. Our friends from Nebraska who've graciously let us use their lap top get to head home tomorrow morning. One picture is an example of the "Chinglish" I referred to in an earlier post. I hope you will be able to click on it to enlarge it and read it. There are a couple of pictures of Josie (of course) and a picture of her at the medical exam we needed for the US consulate. The doctor there was most concerned with a scar on Josie's right hand. She even measured it. We think it was a mosquito bite which Josie scratched and then it became infected. Anyway, it was funny that the doctor spent more time on that than on Josie's arm. Also, the doctor had not heard of brachial plexus injuries (or of scoliosis, as another of our group has that diagnosis). Josie's temp was also of concern. But she refuses to take off her sweater (because everyone points to the scars on her arms) and she'd been in our carrier (little oven) and had been crying. We promised she was not running a fever! The other picture is at the pearl market.

Other highlights: nearly everyone in China knows how to say "hello." They greet us often and also yell it to get our attention or use it to point to items on a menu we may like. Still, it makes us feel more comfortable. I brought along my favorite book and found someone who wanted to read it. This person even wanted two copies, one for a friend. Chris and I ventured to an area with no foreigners to see what it would be like. People did stare at us but they tried to not create a stir. I was glad Chris was there with me. A couple of people did point to Josie and asked, "Chinese?" Some were obviously confused. One was able to say, "daughter?" Friends from Ohio have been yelled at for having a Chinese daughter but for the most part people are not angry, just curious. I know there are rumors here that Americans come and buy these girls and there is distrust as to why. They like seeing Josie respond well to us and smile or reach for us. Some ask her questions, but she isn't able to answer. Again, the friend from Ohio had someone ask in English about his daughter and when he responded yes, that she was his, they didn't believe him and insisted he was holding her while he waited for his friend to come out of the shop.

Josie is also doing better with attachment. At a store yesterday I was concerned when a saleslady talked to her and tried to get her to come (which they all do) and Josie actually lifted her arms to be taken. I said no and made sure she stayed in her stroller. But then while talking again, Josie lost sight of me and turned in a panic to make sure I was there. That is actually a really good sign in the adoption/attachment world. She is also loving to come running pell-mell into my arms shrieking the whole way and then collapsing into me. And she and her other two pals from Nanjing (all 2 years) love to point to each other's noses and talk and boss each other around. It is quite a sight with the three of them in a circle in their strollers yacking away. None of us Americans know if they are really saying anything!

I may be able to post once more before we leave Guangzhou (without pictures), but don't worry if we don't. We should arrive back home this weekend. We do not look forward to the flight home or the jet lag, so you can pray for us there. Also, we'd love prayer for two gals in our group who are flying home with 5 year olds who've never been told no. Neither mom has her husband here or a travel companion! One leaves tomorrow (Wed) and the other Friday (remember we are 13 hours ahead of you).

We can't wait to introduce you to the newest Riddle!

Guangzhou!

We made it to Guangzhou! Josie did a great job on the flight. She is signing more, drink, and eat. She is smiling and laughing bunches. She loves to have Mommy imitate faces and she's learned how to give kisses. She is delightful! The pictures are of her hometown in Nanjing, of our group of families all adopting special needs kids, of the three kids from Nanjing's orphanage, and some of our cutie!

Internet access will be extremely limited; we will not be able to post every day. Janice/Shana, our room # is 1131 at the White Swan. Our phone card is done so we hope you will be able to get ahold of us over the phone. If we don't hear from you this evening, we'll get another phone card.

Things are going well. This is a tourist area: lots of English, lots of American food. It seems more like a vacation here.

China 5/11

Today we opted out of the trip to the park and hung out at the hotel as well as the vendors. We needed to sleep in a bit! So I thought I'd post some of the cultural differences and amusements today.

* (Kids may want to skip this paragraph.) It is unusual to NOT be stared at and pointed at here. If we pause, we are sure to gather a crowd. Our agency has supplied us with neck ribbons attached to a card explaining why we are hereas well as why we have a Chinese girl with us in case it gets sticky. We've used it more than once. Disabled people fare worse. Our group has a little guy with an unrepaired cleft palate and an adopting parent who is overweight. These two get pointed to, laughed at, and imitated. Every once in a while there is a diabled person begging and the Chinese people rush to cross the street to avoid contact. One person was told about their cleft-affected child, "we throw them away." A guide told us, "We know there are orphans and their life is hard, but we don't care." They do not understand us "Crazy Americans" and tell us so.

*We so far have not plunged our toothbrushes under the tap water; yeah! If we did, we'd have to throw away the toothbrush. The tap water is unsafe for "foreigners" as well as locals. We also are remembering to throw the toilet paper into the waste basket as we cannot flush it. The sewer system could not handle that. And we have avoided ice. The locals here do not have anything cold. Ice and cold drinks are new.

*There is no personal space. This is most noticable in driving. Just nose in (no matter if it is not your lane or if you are crossing five lanes) and if you are bigger or arrive a fraction of a second earlier, it's all yours. Crosswalks are a bit like the old game, "frogger."

*There is a very repulsive smell coming from the sewer grates. No surprise there. But it also comes from every restaurant and food vendor. Thankfully, you do get accustomed to it while you are sitting in the restaurant or you would most likely not be able to eat. Unless, of course you are more adventuresome, like Chris. Tonight he enjoyed eel as well as the duck (served whole) and other treats as we went out with our guide.

*The mattresses in Beijing were very hard. The mattresses in Nanjing are surprisingly more hard. We hear the hardest is yet to come in Guanghzou!

*The laws passed against spitting in public in Beijing (for the Olympics) are not being followed. But laws, we are told, are suggestions anyway.

*If you need to use the squatty potty, you will find a way. And there are usually sinks to wash your hands. But no soap. We went to a supermarket and I followed a cashier through the system who'd just run Chris' card. A quick rinse, no soap, and back to the groceries!

*We saw a group of Goth Chinese today. They received even more attention than we do and also got lots of dirty looks. If Goth is rejecting the culture, I can see that this would be even more of an insult to the Chinese.

*There is lots of what we've heard referred to as "Chinglish." It is English in the signs and sayings that follows Chinese grammar rules or is poorly translated. There is not so much in Nanjing as there is usually no English at all, but it was all over Beijing. Now I cannot think of examples. But there is a sign by the elevators here that reads "rubbish recepticle" by the trash can. There are better examples; wish I could think.

*Smoking is everywhere, including the elevators.

*Lastly, there is no firm price (except the supermarket and malls). Everything is bartered. The vendors try to hide their excitement when a foreigner comes to their stall, but it is difficult for them. They could make a profit off one American to equal a month's wages, or more. We decided to barter for the girls' dresses and a shirt for the rest of us in Chinese tradition. Each purchase has a story, but here's my favorite; it is for my shirt. Walk in. Swarmed by two salesladies. (Jill explained 5 years ago no one would have waited on us because they were all paid the same whether they work or not. Now pay is by commission.) I picked out the shirt, asked the price. 360 yuan. (1 US dollar = 7.6 yuan.) I say, "No, thank you" and shake my head. "No?" (gives me calculator) "How much?" I type in 30. Salesclerk pretends to be shocked and dismayed. Fellow sales girl enters and begins bemoaning she was gone when the Americans came. She is clueless how much is communicated in non-verbals/tone and the word, "American" which sounds like "American" in Mandarin! "Okay, 220 yuan." "No, 30." "120" "No, thank you. (walk away). "Wait! 90!! 90!" "No, 30, thank you, I'll go over there." "Okay, okay, 40." "Deal." They still made a killing, but it's the price I was going for. Gullible American.

We leave for Guanghzou tomorrow. We may or may not have internet access and may or may not be able to send pictures if we do. We have one week down!!!! We are glad we came.

Pictures for Finding Day and Orphanage Day

Here are some pictures of Josie in our hotel room, her finding site, the orphanage, the street side driving by, and Josie and her Baba.

Look at that arm move!

This young gal was so interested in Josie's story; I hope word gets around that Josie has a home!

Josie's bed is at the front. The other empty be is Abbys.

The little girl who's left has a family; we had her on our list to get pictures for her mommy.

Note bicycles and clothes hanging out to dry; these were everywhere!

Orphanage Visit

This morning the three of us who are adopting from Nanjing's Social Welfare Institute, plus a couple of other families visited the orphanage. We discovered Josie and Abagail's beds were in a threesome. Only one little girl is there now and she has a family. We took lots of pictures for them. Seeing Josie's little bed in the corner by the heater and the window was the only time I cried. Most of the time I was shooting pictures and making sure we were getting lots of the kids we had on our list. There is a yahoo group for that orphanage and the hopeful parents sent us their children's names before we left. We saw one group eating lunch in the hall. We saw three rooms for the 0-1 year olds (all in their cribs) and several rooms for the 1-2 year olds (all in their cribs). There are play rooms and learning rooms which we also took pictures of, but there were no children in them. As we left the orphanage director (a different one this time) gave us a little glass ornament with An Hong's name on it, the chicken zodiac, and good luck wishes. They gave us a brocade of the symbol of Nanjing with a card (which I've not yet read because Wendy told me it would make me cry). Josie and Wendy's Abagail shared the same room from the time of entrance (they were born a week apart) until May 8th. They will fly back to the states on the same flight too. The orphanage was clean and the children interacted with us. But it is still hard to see so many babies in their cribs crying. No one responds.

Josie did fine. We took her in not knowing what her reaction would be. We put her in a carrier facing her Baba so she would feel more secure and so the nannies could not take her to hold her (they still tried). She was tired but didn't cry. In fact, she didn't really respond to them at all. But they gushed over her and were obviously pleased to meet her Baba and Mama. And I am so glad for their care of Josie for these last two years. She made it!

It's Official

Today we finalized the adoption and Josie is now officially ours according to PRC! Yesterday we had signed a 24 hour guardianship agreement as they have us wait a day as a kind of "trial run" before the adoption is permanent. While waiting Josie had a major meltdown and so I took her outside of the building. A large number of Chinese people were quite disturbed by her show and came up to talk to her so she kept it up for some time. (I had made her take the Cheerio with her right hand, which she is quite capable of doing, hence the drama.) The children here seem to be given whatever they want and are not told no according to what I have seen. She has quite an adjustment ahead of her. This evening she pushed down her little friend we were visiting, so Daddy put her in his lap. Another meltdown. These next few days may be a battle of "I'm more stubborn than you are" and she has an advantage being in China where so many are sympathetic to her. But I am getting off-topic. I meant to say, "hurray!!!!!!!! She is ours!!!!!!!!!"

And I should also add, we started to see a happy little girl this afternoon. I laid down with her at naptime and she talked and sang a song and vocalized more than we'd imagined she could (hey, she doesn't know what "shhh" means!). After our rest, she was all smiles and giggles. Yesterday there was only a rare smile and we had to work for it! Also, Grams will be glad to know her first English word was "giraffe." We were looking through a book of animals and she said it three times! Her first Chinese word was "mama" which is what the nannies call themselves.

In an ironic twist, on the day she officially has her family, we went with our guide, Min, to visit her "finding spot." I so wish I could post pictures right now but that will have to wait a day. We took a taxi to the "gate" which turned out to be a little street with 3-4 story buildings. A group of men were playing a card game on the corner. Another corner held a little garden for sale with two elderly gentlemen and a dog standing guard. The gate was actually a door into one of the buildings. In the window were ducks ready to be sold and inside was a butcher store. There was a little ledge along the window beside the door on which I imagine she was placed. As I took pictures, several people began to gather around and Min showed them the finding ad. The butcher store was there two years ago but Min didn't tell me if the people inside remembered An Hong. One young woman held Josie's hand and told us she loved her name and was quite taken by her story. Four or five of the people inside came in. A grandmotherly lady told us we should have Josie's legs covered (it was the first time we'd ventured out without every inch covered on her; we'd been worried she'd dehydrate with all the sweat!). More and more came, though they backed out of the pictures. We hope word will somehow get back to the birth family (assuming they are unofficially known; which is quite possible). I am so thankful to have had this opportunity. Only one other family in our group was able to visit their son's site.

And on a lighter note, we had McDonald's for dinner tonight. We just could not handle the other smells today. We had a quarter pounder with cucumbers and a spicy sauce. It was very good. Josie likes fries. Unfortunately, we had to dump the drinks out since we couldn't communicate that we didn't want ice. We've been very careful to only drink sealed water bottles and not eat any uncooked fruits or veggies we couldn't peel. So far so good! I am still light-headed and dizzy some, but I assume I am missing something from my usual diet and hopeful I will figure it out soon.

Chloe, we found a traditional Chinese dress for you today (in pink of course) and have a light blue one for Josie. Michael, we are trying to find a good outfit for you, too. We have to barter for them and I'm quite sure we are being taken. But most of us don't mind so much because the cost is still minimal. Today, for instance our taxi ride to the finding spot and back (across a town of millions, mind you) was a little over four US dollars. McDonalds costs about the same though ( :

Tomorrow is a museum and a tour of Josie's orphanage. Pray she is not frightened by the return or confused by it. Next day our group plans to go to a park and then perhaps a brocade museum (Nanjing is famous for it). The next day it is on to Guangzhou for a week of waiting for the US to issue Josie's visa.

Gotcha Day

It is now 8:45 pm and Josie is sound asleep in her crib next to our bed. When they called Josie's name and had us come forward (3rd of 12) she started to let me take her but soon began to cry. We learned quickly that she likes to throw herself backwards when unhappy! But we had learned a trick from Grandpa Riddle and had some fruity treats which quickly worked and had the tears stopped and an interested, if not content look on her face. We were able to meet her orphanage director (left in picture), Half-the-Sky Grandmother (the older lady of whom our reports said Josie was closest to), a nanny, and Coco-the assistant/interpreter for the orphanage director. I was able to ask many questions such as, what is special about An Hong? (She's smart and has a great smile.)

Josie was in a daze much of the day. She hates going into places because she loves being outdoors. She cries when she doesn't get her way and right now this is the only way she has to communicate, so we are getting a lot of it! But tonight we gave her Hawiian pizza and she did well. (Did you hear that Chloe and Michael; won't she fit right in?) After a piping hot cup of milk, she was even giggling! She is frightened of so much; there are so many new things: the gold fish in the elegant hotel pond, a real bath (instead of a sponge bath), stores...

Health: She has one ear with a smaller hole; I have not yet looked in it. She does not seem to have an ear infection or any trouble with upper respiratory!! Her skin is a mess. The nannies say it is very sensitive, even for an Asian child and that it scars very easily. I'd say. Her body has little marks all over-possibly scratched bug bites. But the bath and lotion helped. Her hand is doing well. She has full range of motion in the fingers and a functional grip. She lacks some supination actively (turning palm up) and her shoulder is quite involved. It will be enlightening to see X-rays in a couple of months. Her scapula is winged and I don't yet know if it I can get it to retract passively. She also has some bony involvement in the back of her hand at her wrist, pinky side. Again, perhaps an X-ray will help figure out what is going on there. We are looking at lots of therapy. Surgery may be necessary, but I'm pretty clueless about that.

Bonding: She is making great eye contact! It is a little difficult for her to relax, but the low tone helps (she can't maintain the muscle tone to support herself away from us when we're feeding her a tippy cup of hot milk). She is smiling and watching us and prefers us to the strangers around her, even the Chinese.

Thank you for praying for us. I am feeling much better; not sick today. The food we can happily eat here is limited (lots of eel, chicken feet, duck liver...), so pray for our nutrition/strength. Every day our scheduled activities are different and at different times, so you can also pray for Josie's sleep and for us to still try to get to some sort of schedule. A friend is adopting an older boy who is very active and having a difficult time fully accepting his mom because of the language barrier. She is here by herself. Pray for strength and wisdom for her. We hope to tour the orphanage and also go to Josie's finding site. Please pray that works out for us as there are six other families our guide is also working with. And continue to pray that Josie will bond with us and quickly learn our limits (ie. not push them constantly or throw fits).

Chloe and Michael, it has been great to talk with you on the phone. You are going to love Josie. She is precious. We are showing her lots of pictures of you two and she cannot wait to meet you. We can already tell she is a bit ornery, stubborn, and loves to read. Does she sound like a Riddle?

PS: On the plane yesterday from Beijing to Nanjing, a travel mate read about Greensburg.

Meet Josie An Riddle!

Hello everyone!

At approximately 10:30 AM China time, we had the opportunity to meet our new daughter: Josie An Riddle.

Here are some pictures...

More Photos from Beijing

This is the Night Food Court. You see starfish and octipi. Lots of strange creatures here served on sticks. There was one very pungent dish called stinky beans. It made Selena gag.

The portion of the Great Wall Chris climbed.
(Sorry for the small size - this photo wouldn't load correctly!)

The copper vessels have a design hand drawn. Then a lady guestimates the copper wire length, dips it in glue and places it over the line...again and again. Then the vase is covered with enamel powder and fired. This occurs 5 times to fill up the area with enamel. It is hand powdered/painted. Then it is filed and polished. All by hand! Amazing

This is an "official" standing guard at the place the emperors are buried. Between Chris and me is our Beijing guide, "Jill."

These gals are performing a routine to music, bending themselves in ways you wouldn't think the human body could bend, all while spinning those plates.

Second Post from China

Sunday (your Saturday night) we packed in a full day in Beijing. After touring a jade factory and store we climbed the Great Wall. Well, Chris did. He bought a t-shirt at the top that says, "I climbed the Great Wall." I tried to find one that said, "I threw up on the Great Wall" but I don't think they sold them. Let's just say I left my mark and it wasn't even half way up. I didn't earn the t-shirt either. All was well by lunch time where we enjoyed some new dishes, thankfully Americanized Chinese food. Afterwards we toured an enamel ware/brass store and I took some photos of the process (which I am hoping to post). Sorry about the lack of photos. We cannot seem to get them to go over the internet quickly enough, even though we can download them to the computer. Next we toured an area of the Ming Tomb and finished up with a Chinese acrobats show. (We'd seen one in Branson a few years back and this was similar but shorter. It's a good thing; many of us were falling asleep during the show. We are exhausted!)

Monday we rose early to catch our flight to Nanjing. We arrived at our hotel about an hour ago and have a meeting in another hour. Tomorrow is Gotcha Day! We are so excited to meet Josie!

I am feeling a bit sick right now; may be coming down with a fever. Please pray for me to be healthy when we get our girl tomorrow!

If the pictures load, there is one of the Night Food Court not far from our hotel in Beijing and the rest are from our day's activities.

We're Here!

It took us a while. Our 3 hour layover in Chicago ended up being 10 hours. But after spending the day at the airport we were able to get on the plane at 8pm (we left home at 3:30 am). The picture of the haz. mat team happened after we were boarded. We had a jet fuel spill! So we finally got started on the 12 hour flight after an hour on the plane waiting for the cleanup! We arrived at our hotel in Beijing at 1am. Chris wanted me to make sure you heard his highlight of the trip: two airplane meals and one snack.

Today (Saturday) we got to see Tianamen Square. The picture in front of the Olympic Countdown Clock is of us standing in the Square.





We also toured the Forbidden City (picture of us with the lion).

The afternoon was spent on a Hutong tour in the old neighborhood of Beijing. These homes are courtyard-based and high in community living (including a shared squatty potty). A woman who had lived there for 45 years cooked us a sampler lunch in her home! What a rare opportunity that was! The picture of us eating is part of our travel group. We are in her living room. The other table was in her bedroom area. The entire house was the size of our living room back home. And she and her husband raised three children there! We traveled there by rickshaw and that picture was taken by our driver.

I didn't even make it through one day before I got to experience my first squatty potty! But it was a "Three Star" and is said to be much cleaner than the usuals.

Tomorrow we are to tour the Great Wall, a jade factory (jade bracelets are passed down from mother in law to daughter in law), and the Ming tomb. Monday we fly to Nanjing and meet Josie on Tuesday. We have limited access to the internet here in Beijing. (I am using a travel-mate's laptop right now!) So I may not be able to update you until after we are in Nanjing.

Prayer: For a good night's sleep. We are going on about 3-4 hours' sleep for the last three nights! For adjustment to the 13 hour time difference. For health as we are going on limited sleep and we are being pushed during the day with tours so we will stay awake during the day!

Chloe and Michael, we love you and miss you! Thanks for calling us!